b164ac9f

Persitence

Sat, 24 Sep 2022 19:37:58 GMT

To achieve the outcome we desire, we must be persistent in our effort.

In addition to coaching addiction recovery, I also spent many years coaching parkour, sometimes described as the art of efficient movement. As a result, I tend to frequently use parkour analogies in my coaching practice. Below is a short video clip from one of my solo parkour training sessions many years ago, to help illustrate the topic of this article: persistence. Notice how many times I did the same practice run to prepare for the actual stunt, and how many times I "chickened out" once I had decided to really send it. After successfully clearing the gap the first time, I continued to drill it until I could stick the landing on the narrow ledge.

To achieve the outcome we desire, we must be persistent in our effort. W. E. Hickson said it best with the all too familiar quote: “if at first you don’t succeed, try, try, try again.”

In the above video clip, you see me trying to successfully perform a parkour movement known as a kong-precision (king kong vault to a precision landing). I knew what I wanted to do. I was confident that I possessed the physical strength and ability to perform the movement, thanks to hundreds of hours of training. So why did it take so many attempts to finally do it?

There can be many “obstacles” that get in the way of achieving what we want; both internal and external. In this particular example, the main block to my success was internal–the block of fear.

Fear of physical injury. Fear of failure. Fear of disappointment. I was by myself at the time, so fear of embarrassment was not a factor, but it commonly is when other people are present.

Had I attempted this movement a few years before, another big obstacle would have been lack of skill and physical strength, so I would not have achieved success in just one training session as shown in this video. But it is by being persistent in my training over the course of several years that I have arrived at my current skill level in parkour.

The same goes for everything in which I am or have been involved: breakdance, snowboarding, rock climbing, piano, school, relationships, religion, employment, learning a foreign language, etc.. Persistence has been a key factor to achieving any level of success in all of these areas.

The path to recovery from addiction has been no exception. I have failed over and over and over again. Every time I did not succeed at resisting an urge to use–every time I managed my emotions in an unhealthy way–I just tried, tried, tried again. And still today if I ever feel like I am starting down a slippery slope, I don’t just give up and give in to my addiction, but I continue to be persistent in recovery every day of my life.

I am and will be persistent every day of my life because that is what it takes to be successful. No matter how many times you fall short of a goal, keep trying. You have not failed until you have stopped trying. No matter what it is you want in life–whether it is to develop a skill like parkour or to break free from an addiction–“try, try, try again” and continue trying. Be persistent. You CAN do it!

Accountability

Sat, 24 Sep 2022 19:21:30 GMT

One of the most powerful tools in addiction recovery

Being accountable is one of the most powerful choices you can make to recover from addiction. Being accountable essentially means you report back on your behavior. Some kind of record is made of what you have done and not done. A person who is unaccountable has no motivation to stay clean other than just inner desire to do so. When accountability is done right, it adds a level of defense because after a while you will start to think before doing anything, “I need to be accountable for this” and that thought can help you stay strong in a moment of weakness.

Imagine for a moment that each of your actions, words, and thoughts were all on public display in real-time. How might this impact your behavior?

Short of an extreme “Truman Show” type of experiment, this level of accountability is not possible. For those who are religious, there is a common belief that God is aware of everything we do, say, and think. If you truly believe this, it should be be enough to keep you sober, right? Not quite. Our mortal minds are fragile and forgetful, and rely heavily on the five senses. So the thought of an Omniscient being, no matter how strong our faith is in said Being, does not hold our attention for very long.

Now imagine for a moment that another human being who you know well will learn of all of your actions, words, and thoughts, shortly after the behaviors take place. How might this influence your behaviors?

There is no perfect system for holding yourself accountable, but as long as the basic principles of openness, honestly, and transparency are applied, you’ll be well on your way. Practice and discipline are required to achieve effective accountability.

It is very helpful to have multiple accountability partners and develop a habit of reaching out to them several times a day. Whether you’re feeling weak or strong, reach out and check in with your accountability partners daily to build a habit. If you develop a routine of contacting your accountability partners regularly, you will be significantly more likely to reach out when you need it the most–during a time of weakness or temptation–when they can support you. So get in the habit of calling, texting, meeting for lunch, emailing, whatever contact you can get. Each check-in does not need to be overly complicated. Keep it simple! If you’re doing well: “today I am feeling strong.” If you’re struggling: “today I am feeling really tempted” or “I’m going to be alone this afternoon, and I’m worried about what I might do” or “I relapsed a few minutes ago, here is my plan to get back on track.”

Carefully choosing accountability partners is crucial. It is very important that you find individuals in whom you feel you can confide without judgement. There are likely well-meaning people in your life who just do not understand addiction and could very well make the situation worse if you turn to them with your struggles. This is why it is best to find people in a similar situation as you. Your best bet is to attend 12 Step Recovery groups and meet people there. Most groups have some time to socialize before or after each meeting, and even plan fun get-togethers and outings to build relationships. Attend meetings, introduce yourself, exchange contact info, ask if it’s okay to check-in occasionally and offer the same, build relationships.

As an added source of accountability, please feel free to leave comments below and share your victories, your struggles, your fears, whatever you want to share. Please refrain from sharing graphic descriptions, as these may be triggering to other readers.

The Modern Day Plague

Sat, 24 Sep 2022 18:34:49 GMT

What is plaguing the modern world in which we live today?

What is It?

In our world today exists a deadly plague that is no respecter of persons; male and female, young and old, all races, religions, occupations and social statuses are susceptible. Millions are falling victim to it without ever knowing what hit them. People are dying, families are devastated, communities are destroyed. This plague is being spread in school, on the bus, at work, around the mall, in the local grocery store, and at home by means of the computer, smart phone, tablet, cable and satellite TV, DVD's, books, magazines, text messages, verbal conversation, and yes even our own minds. What is it? Pornography.

Lust is the virus behind the global porn plague. Symptoms of lust include, but are not limited to: consumption of soft- and hardcore pornography, compulsive masturbation, sexual addiction, co-dependency, sexting, fornication, prostitution, voyeurism, exhibitionism, physical and emotional infidelity, rape, pedophilia, incest, sex trafficking, STD's, teen pregnancy, abortion, divorce, violence, loss of career, loss of family, loss of self-respect, disrespect and violence toward women, distorted belief about sex and love, depression, drug use, and suicide.

Says who?

Many people just accept pornography use as a part of life and say it is a harmless, fun activity. Some even encourage it by saying it is normal, healthy, and beneficial. So who says it is a plague anyway? Well...

Latter-day Saints ("Mormons")

Boyd K. Packer:

"In our day the dreadful influence of pornography is like unto a plague sweeping across the world, infecting one here and one there, relentlessly trying to invade every home, most frequently through the husband and father. The effect of this plague can be, unfortunately often is, spiritually fatal."
"The priesthood holds consummate power. It can protect you from the plague of pornography —and it is a plague —if you are succumbing to its influence." ( http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2010/10/cleansing-the-inner-vessel?lang=eng )

Gordon B. Hinkley:

"Avoid pornography as you would a plague ." ( http://www.lds.org/ensign/2002/01/overpowering-the-goliaths-in-our-lives?lang=eng )
"There is an ever-growing plague of pornography swirling about us." ( http://www.lds.org/general-conference/1983/10/be-not-deceived?lang=eng )

Craig A. Cardon:

“Through the enabling and the redeeming power of the Atonement, all those affected in any way by the pernicious plague of pornography may be strengthened to overcome it and be healed of its evil consequences.” ( http://www.lds.org/church/news/new-anti-pornography-website-focuses-on-the-savior )

Spencer W. Kimball:

"Members of the Church everywhere are urged to not only resist the widespread plague of pornography , but as citizens to become actively and relentlessly engaged in the fight against this insidious enemy of humanity around the world.
"And so we say to you: Teach your children to avoid smut as the plague it is. As citizens, join in the fight against obscenity in your communities. Do not be lulled into inaction by the pornographic profiteers who say that to remove obscenity is to deny people the rights of free choice. Do not let them masquerade licentiousness as liberty." ( http://www.lds.org/general-conference/print/1976/10/a-report-and-a-challenge?lang=eng )

Quintin L. Cook:

"We also recognized there is virtually no place on earth that cannot be impacted by salacious, immoral, and titillating images. This is one reason why pornography has become such a plague in our day." ( http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/10/can-ye-feel-so-now?lang=eng )

Jews

Rabbi Abraham J. Twerski. M.D:

"I doubt that at any time in our history has there been as grave a threat to the morality of our people and to the stability of the Jewish family as the plague of addiction to internet pornography ." ( http://www.guardyoureyes.org/?p=2320 )

Tzvi Fishman:

"The Plague of Internet Pornography ...Up until now [2006], religious Jewish parents could delude themselves by saying, 'Those statistics are for the Goyim.' But a disturbing article recently published in Israel by a very respected Torah scholar, Rabbi Elisha Aviner, has changed all that. While the article does not cite hard statistics it makes it very clear that the problem has infiltrated the walls of Orthodox Judaism, and that a great many Jewish teenagers are hooked on Internet porn." ( http://www.israelnationalnews.com/Articles/Article.aspx/6499#.UkM9toZthJ8 )

Catholics

Bishop Loverde:

"In my forty years as a priest, I have seen the evil of pornography spread like a plague throughout our culture. What was once the shameful and occasional vice of the few has become the mainstream entertainment for the many" ( http://www.arlingtondiocese.org/bishop/about_boughtprice.aspx )

Baptists

Pastor Jay Dennis:

“'Churches are facing a spiritual battle against a hidden plague that is keeping many believers from fulfilling their part of God’s mission,' said Dennis, pastor of First Baptist Church at the Mall in Lakeland, Fla. That hidden plague is pornography ." ( http://ib2news.org/2013/04/30/anti-pornography-campaign-to-launch-at-sbc-meeting-in-houston/ )

Other various religious leaders:

"As leaders of churches and synagogues in Florida, we recognize and accept our responsibility to speak clearly and forcefully in condemnation of this contemporary moral plague . We reject pornography in any form and urge all people in our state to join with us." ( http://www.flaccb.org/statements/1986/porngraphy.pdf )

What if I'm not Religious?

Okay, so you might be thinking, all these quotes are just from a bunch of religious extremists who are prudes and have no credibility in calling pornography a plague . Maybe you are more of a scientific evidence person. No problem, everyday there is more and more scientific research proving just how harmful, addictive, and damaging pornography is. In addition to being spiritually damaging and condemned by God (see Matthew 5:27-30 ), pornography use has serious physiological, psychological, social, and financial consequences. Some of this information is summarized below.

Relationship Damage

Probably the most affected area of a porn addict’s life is relationships. Studies show that exposure to pornographic material leads to the following:

Greater acceptance of sex before marriage
Having more sex partners
Rating their partners as less attractive
Being less satisfied with their partners sexual performance
Greater desire for sex without emotional involvement
More sex callousness
Trying to get partners to act out scenes from pornographic films
Increasing their estimates of how often people engage in sex with animals
Increasing their estimates of how often people engage in sex with violence
Increasing their estimates of how often people engage in sex in groups
Going to prostitutes
Greater acceptance of sex outside of marriage for married individuals
More likely to have an affair
Using more sexual terms to describe women
Reduced support for the women’s liberation movement
Less child centeredness during marriage
Reduced desire for female children
Believing that you don’t need to restrict pornography from children
More alcohol use
More binge drinking
Engaging in more behavioral aggression
Engaging in marital rape

For a complete list of studies supporting these points, see here .

Why is it a Plague?

The use of pornography, especially when coupled with masturbation, is highly addictive. The flood of powerful chemicals released in your brain while viewing pornographic material has a strong binding effect on your brain and essentially "glue" you to the images. When your brain is repeatedly flooded by these chemicals over time your brain actually changes. Shrinkage of the prefrontal cortex weakens your ability to think rationally, while the part of your brain controlling impulsivity is strengthened.

In addition to porn being addictive, three main factors help it to spread like a plague:

Accessible. It can be accessed from your phone in the palm of your hand within seconds.
Affordable. Most pornographic material is available free of charge.
Anonymous. Because it can be accessed from the comfort and convenience of your home, there is no fear of running into a neighbor while walking out of an X-rated movie, or being seen by a coworker in the adult section of a book store, etc.. You do not need to show your face to anyone when accessing porn at home. In many cases, the user is the only mortal being who knows about their use for many years.

What is Pornography

Sat, 24 Sep 2022 18:34:48 GMT

How to define and identify porn

The purpose of this post is to make sure that everyone who views this blog understands what I mean when I say "pornography." In our society today there are many different ideas and concepts about porn, so it is important that we are all on the same page. For our purposes, pornography will be defined as follows.

General Definitions

Most of the world's population, when asked the question, What is pornography? would typically think of hardcore pornography. A smaller group would include softcore pornography in their definition. And all but a virtually nonexistent group of proactive members of the anti-porn movement would completely exclude much of the material that can and should be considered pornography. SA Lifeline Foundation offers the following definitions in it's book, " Understanding Pornography and Sexual Addiction " for soft- and hardcore as well as on-demand pornography:

"Softcore pornography generally consists of models posing topless or nude, as is common in Playboy magazines. Hardcore porn involves images of people actually engaging in graphic sexual acts or poses. On-demand pornography is available on the internet for a cost, allowing viewers to specify the exact acts they want to see performed in front of the camera."

Hardcore pornography can be hetero- or homosexual in nature. It may include vaginal, anal, oral, hand and other sex acts. More perverted forms include violence, child porn, and bestiality which is sex acts involving animals.

More Specific

Hopefully the definitions given thus far are clear and widely accepted. Now we will dig a little deeper to find more potential sources of pornography. One definition I have commonly heard is any material created with the intent of arousing sexual desire. Using this definition we can classify much more material as pornography. A limitless assortment of photos, videos, text, music, and fashion styles that do not include the depiction of explicit sex acts or full nudity, nevertheless are created to entice, titillate, and arouse.

Marketing campaigns for much of the products and services we purchase are pornographic. The marketing companies have discovered that "sex sells." Take Carl's Jr, for example. They know that if they stimulate their viewers's sex drive, they are more likely to make a sale, so it can be said that much of the advertising we are exposed to is created with the intent of arousing sexual desire and therefore it is pornography. Advertisements are just one example. Music videos, movies, TV shows, books, and magazines are often created for the purpose of creating sexual arousal. These are pornography.

Getting Personal

Now we will take it even a step further. In clinical terms, pornography is defined as anything used for the purpose of arousing sexual desire. Whether or not it was intentionally created for the purpose of sexual arousal does not matter; what matters is how a person uses it. This personalizes the definition to each individual. What may be pornography for one person is not necessarily for another.

Going along with this definition of pornography, let’s see just how easy it really is to access...Facebook, Instagram, SnapChat, Twitter, Youtube are full of material that if not intentionally sexual, can easily be sexualized by the viewer. Watching R-rated movies is an obvious one that we all know we should avoid, but what about inappropriate PG-13 and even PG movies? What about TV-M or TV-14 shows? What about video games? There’s the less-conspicuous glancing at the magazines at the checkout stand in the grocery store. Gawking at a person’s body at the beach, on the street, in school, or even at church--whether that person intentionally dressed in a provocative way or not-- lust is in the eye of the beholder ; an observer can sexualize virtually anything, even people who are modest and appropriately dressed. What about the images we create, or re-create, in our own minds? Do our thoughts arouse sexual desire? If so, our thoughts have become pornography.

Conclusion

Did you realize how much pornography you and your loved ones are exposed to on a daily basis? No wonder sex addiction is the most difficult addiction to recover from; imagine an alcoholic who is handed a beer every time he turns on the TV or a drug addict who gets a hit of heroin each time she checks her email. How difficult would it be for them to gain abstinence and recover from their addictions? Thus is the severity of sex addiction. As one addict shared: "In my eyes cocaine doesn't hold a candle to this. I have done both. …Quitting even the hardest drugs was nothing compared to [trying to quit pornography]."

The truth is this: pornography--in all its forms--is all around us. If you or someone you know have trouble looking away from it, give me a call. I'd love to help you out. As always, I'll give you a free consultation and some info that will help you.

A Shift in Battle: Part 1

Wed, 15 Apr 2015 19:58:29 GMT

Prepare for War

Shift in Battle

A Latter-day Saint Perspective on Pornography Warfare

Part I: Prepare for War

written by: Vincent Grosso, CPC

April 2015

For your convenience, this article is color coded as follows:

red text = Direct quote

green text = Paraphrasing

Pure in Heart

At the priesthood session of the April 1975 General Conference, Elder Vaughn J. Featherstone said:

I told a group of Aaronic Priesthood holders out in the congregation tonight, if they are pure in heart, they may sleep through my talk, because my talk is directed to those who are not pure in heart.

I wish to say the same to you reading this article now. If you believe you are completely pure in heart, feel free to stop reading. However, if you feel your heart could be a bit more pure, please continue reading, take some time to carefully consider the information presented here, and then apply and share these concepts as you feel so inspired. I am going to jump right into the heart of the issue I would like to address so as to not waste any time.

Names on a Scroll

In the above mentioned conference talk, titled “ A Self-Inflicted Purging ,” Elder Featherstone goes on to say:

...in your mind’s eye, wherever you are across the far corners of the earth, would you picture a huge scroll sliding down from the ceiling? On it are listed the names of those who purchased pornographic literature. The list is large enough so that all may see. Is your name on the list?

Did you buy some pornographic literature?

Now suppose those names are removed, and the names of all those who attended or viewed x-rated movies are presented so that all who are in the congregation may see. Again, is your name on the list?

Today, the list on the scroll might include the names of those who have viewed pornography on a computer, tablet, or smartphone.

Let’s move on to the next question he asks.

Now, my young friends, and I am sorry to say, many adults, how about all those of you who have a masturbation problem? If the names of those who had the problem were projected across this big, huge scroll, would your name be there, or would you be able to sit back confident and pure in heart?

If you feel uncomfortable right now, you are not alone. We hear it said jokingly that “98% of people masturbate...and the other 2% are lying about it.” Well, that may be a slight exaggeration, but not by much. Results from the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior show that 94% of men and 85% of women masturbate.

I had a mission companion who asked me if I had ever masturbated. Embarrassed, I sheepishly admitted to it. I then found out that he made a habit of asking this question to as many people as he could (once he got to know them well enough for it to be comfortable to do so--okay, well maybe not comfortable, but at least slightly less awkward), because he wanted to one day meet someone who had never done it. His search continues.

Elder Featherstone shares the story of a father who talked to his 11-year-old son about masturbation. The father explained to his son that if he never masturbates, then 8 years later he would be able to meet with his bishop and stake president in preparation to serve a mission and tell them that he has never done it. "And you would be quite a rare young man.” Indeed he would be.

Prepare for Battle

In the Book of Mormon, toward the end of the Book of Alma, we read about a lot of gory battles and wars. I personally love these chapters, not because I am a violent person, but because I can easily draw parallels between the ancient physical battles we read about and the modern spiritual battles we face in our lives. In Alma chapter 43 , we read about one such conflict between the Nephites and Lamanites.

Moroni, at the young age of 25, is the leader of the Nephite army. Zarahemna is the leader of the wicked Lamanite army. Moroni prepares his men not only with weapons, but also armor; shields, helmets, breastplates, arm plates, and thick clothing. The Lamanites, led by a man by the name of Zerahemna, only had their weapons; as for armor and clothing, they were virtually naked ( vv 15-21 ).

Let’s pause there and compare this scene to us today. In general, as a church, I like to think that we are like the Nephites. We are prepared, we have on our armor and thick clothing, armed with weapons, we are fighting for a good cause, and most importantly we have the Lord on our side.

I like to compare the Lamanite army to any force that opposes the people of God. We could refer to this army as Satan and his followers. We could call this army the world. We can get more specific and label this the army of drugs and alcohol, depression, abuse, dishonesty, and so on. For our purposes here, we will call this the army of immorality--specifically pornography and masturbation. Whatever label we put on this evil army, we, the people of God are for the most part prepared to meet the army in battle. We have armor, we have weapons, we have faith, we have the Lord on our side, we have valiant leaders who seek inspiration to know how we might gain the advantage in this war.

The Conflict Begins

When the naked Lamanites see the well prepared Nephites, they get scared and run away and decide to go attack a weaker part of the Nephites in the land Manti instead. Of course they thought that the Nephites would not know where they were going. But Monori, being the wise military leader and man of God that he is, asks the prophet, Alma, to pray and inquire of the Lord where the Lamanites are headed. So he finds out where the Lamanites are going to be, and comes up with a plan to divide his army and basically set up an ambush for the Lamanites. Mormoni has his friend Lehi take half the army and hide on the south side of the hill Riplah, which was on the east of the river Sidon, while Moroni hides with the other half of the army in the valley to the west of the river Sidon, and they wait for the Lamanites to come by. When the Lamanites pass the hill Riplah and are about to cross the river, Lehi and his men come out of their hiding place and start attacking the Lamanites from the rear. The unsuspecting Lamanites turn around and start fighting with Lehi’s army of well-prepared Nephites ( vv 22-36 ). Let’s see what happens in this conflict…

And the work of death commenced on both sides, but it was more dreadful on the part of the Lamanites, for their nakedness was exposed to the heavy blows of the Nephites with their swords and their cimeters, which brought death almost at every stroke.

While on the other hand, there was now and then a man fell among the Nephites, by their swords and the loss of blood, they being shielded from the more vital parts of the body, or the more vital parts of the body being shielded from the strokes of the Lamanites, by their breastplates, and their armshields, and their head-plates; and thus the Nephites did carry on the work of death among the Lamanites ( Alma 43: 37-38 ).

At the time Elder Featherstone gave his talk, I would say that we as a church were probably around this point of the battle. “Now and then a man fell” on our side. Occasionally we would lose a soldier to the enemy. But for the most part, as long as we are...

prepared with armor
armed with weapons
fighting on the right team
following a righteous leader

...we have a pretty good chance of being spared from spiritual death, as the Nephites were spared from physical death.

HOWEVER, Elder Featherstone gave this talk 40 years ago . I believe he was able to foresee that something was about to change in our circumstances, as is about to happen in the case of the Nephites. Let’s see what happens next.

Continue reading in the next article Shift in Battle Part II: The Tables Turn

A Shift in Battle: Part 2

Wed, 15 Apr 2015 13:28:29 GMT

The Tables Have Turned

Shift in Battle

A Latter-day Saint Perspective on Pornography Warfare

Part II: The Tables Turn

written by: Vincent Grosso, CPC

April 2015

For your convenience, this article is color coded as follows:

red text = Direct quote (emphasis added)

green text = Paraphrasing

Before continuing, be sure you have read Part I: Prepare for War

The Tables Turn

As we continue to read through the next few verses we see that the Lamanites are terrified and flee from Lehi’s men. They are pursued by Lehi until the banks of the river Sidon. As the Lamanites cross the river they are met by Moroni’s men. After more slaughter, they flee yet again. The Nephites catch up to the Lamanites and once more there is much bloodshed ( vv 39-42 ). But this time, something changes. we start to see the change. Let’s see if you can pick up on it. Pay close attention and try to figure out exactly what it is that changes the course of this battle.

Now in this case the Lamanites did fight exceedingly; yea, never had the Lamanites been known to fight with such exceedingly great strength and courage, no, not even from the beginning.

...yea, they did fight like dragons, and many of the Nephites were slain by their hands, yea, for they did smite in two many of their head-plates, and they did pierce many of their breastplates, and they did smite off many of their arms; and thus the Lamanites did smite in their fierce anger ( vv 43-44 ).

Did you get it? What changed? Why did the advantage in this battle shift from the Nephites to the Lamanites? How were the tables turned?

Did the Nephites take off their armor?
No, it says the Lamanites were now piercing through the armor, dashing their helmets in two. Same armor.
Did the Lamanite army join forces with another army to make them stronger?
Nope, it is the same Lamanite army led by Zerahemna throughout this entire battle. Same enemy.
Did the Lamanites sharpen their weapons?
There was no timeout, no halftime, no lunch break when they would have had time to do anything...they were just fighting and running all day. Same weapons.
Did the Nephites lose faith?
It doesn’t say that either, and in fact, we’ll see a couple verses later that the Nephites were still praying to God and He does hear their prayer, so I don’t think they lost favor in the sight of the Lord. Same faith.
So then, what happened? What did the Nephites do to lose the upper hand in this battle and become more vulnerable?
Nothing.

The Nephites did not let their guard down. The Lamanites did not get stronger or sharpen their weapons...but they did become desperate. They were cornered and became more fierce. More angry. More determined. They gave everything they had, more than ever before. The Lamanites had NEVER been known to fight with such strength. And because the Nephites did NOTHING different, they started to lose a battle that they previously had been winning. As the enemy becomes more desperate, our battle plan must become more sophisticated, our weapons sharper, our armor stronger.

Our Battle

I believe that Elder Featherstone saw what was going on in our modern battle and could see that something was about to change. There was going to be a shift in the battle...just like what happened between the Nephites and Lamanites. In Elder Featherstone’s foresight, I do not believe he was accusing any of us of taking off our spiritual armor or losing our faith. He simply could see that the enemy was getting desperate and would be fighting more valiantly than ever in history. He knew that the spiritual breastplates and helmets that were able to withstand the blows of the enemy before would now be pierced and dashed to pieces. The same enemy is attacking us with the same weapons--only this time with more desperation, determination and efficiency; penetrating more homes, wounding more families, killing more spirits.

Keep in mind that in 1975, to access pornography a person actually had to go out to a store and purchase pornographic literature, or go to an adult theater in a sketchy part of town, pay for a ticket, go inside and watch an X rated movie. If that were all we are talking about, I am fairly confident that virtually no one reading this would have their name on the list that Elder Featherstone talks about.

But today, how can pornography be accessed? It’s as easy as pulling out your smartphone. Nowadays most of pornography consumers do not pay for it, there is plenty of free stuff out there. Viewing it is anonymous, no one will see you walk out of the adult bookstore or theater.

Now, at this point in the battle, things are not looking too good for the Nephites--or for us. At first, this may be discouraging to many. Some may want to give up and give in. Others refuse to accept the truth, they want to ignore reality and go on pretending like everything is okay. Many use disillusioning thoughts such as “I am so glad this is not effecting my family.” The truth is, the enemy’s weapon of pornography is now piercing the spiritual armor of EVERY family in the church.

We, as a church, have not lost faith. We have not stopped praying. We have not stopped reading scriptures. We have not stopped attending church and the temple. Yet, the enemy is starting to destroy us.

Continue reading in the next article Shift in Battle Part III: On to Victory

A Shift in Battle: Part 3

Wed, 15 Apr 2015 13:28:10 GMT

On To Victory

Shift in Battle

A Latter-day Saint Perspective on Pornography Warfare

Part III: On to Victory

written by: Vincent Grosso, CPC

April 2015

For your convenience, this article is color coded as follows:

red text = Direct quote
green text = Paraphrasing

Before continuing, be sure to first read Part I: Prepare for War and Part II: The Tables Turn

On to Victory

Things are about to change...again. This time in the Nephites’ favor, and I believe, in our favor as well. Why do I believe this? How can things turn around? Here’s what happened in the case of the Nephites as described in verses 45 and 48-50 of Alma 53:

Nevertheless, the Nephites were inspired by a better cause, for they were not fighting for monarchy nor power but they were fighting for their homes and their liberties, their wives and their children, and their all, yea, for their rites of worship and their church.

And it came to pass that when the men of Moroni saw the fierceness and the anger of the Lamanites, they were about to shrink and flee from them. And Moroni, perceiving their intent, sent forth and inspired their hearts with these thoughts—yea, the thoughts of their lands, their liberty, yea, their freedom from bondage.

And it came to pass that they turned upon the Lamanites, and they cried with one voice unto the Lord their God , for their liberty and their freedom from bondage.

And they began to stand against the Lamanites with power;and in that selfsame hour that they cried unto the Lord for their freedom, the Lamanites began to flee before them…

From that point the Lamanites are driven by the Nephites all the way back to the river Sidon. The Lamanites are surrounded, all in one body, by the Nephites who are now destroying them ( vv 51-54 )

So it can be with us. Just like the Nephites, we are fighting for a better cause than power; we are fighting for our families and our religion. Just like the Nephites, we have leaders who are inspiring our hearts with encouraging thoughts and words. Just like the Nephites, we CAN and WILL prevail once again over our enemy if we will...

call upon God with faith in Jesus Christ and in His power to strengthen and heal
fight with all our might and “make use of the means which the Lord has provided for us” ( Alma 60:21 )

Conclusion

It is essential for us to realize that the very same spiritual armor that may have worked in the past to protect ourselves and our families against pornography, no longer works today. The enemy has become desperate and is fighting harder than ever, piercing our armor and dashing our shields to pieces. While we are losing many individuals and families in this battle, we can have hope of winning the war because we are fighting for a better cause. In order to win, we need to do more than we have done in the past to defend our homes and our communities. We need to do more to protect our families and friends. We need to do more to preserve our religion and freedom--freedom from addiction. It can be done. On to victory!